Memories from the Forgetful

I have stolen 2 things in this life, not including the gas incident. Honestly, I should be ashamed. No, not because of the normal reason involving morality, but because I stole two of the dumbest items ever on the planet.

Let's do the time warp... punches in 1990 and a few other buttons because I am sure there are more buttons to make this time machine work.... ummmm... ah.... click, type, click....Ah Ha! There we go.

We have arrived in 1990 at a Thriftway Grocery Store in the Cincinnati area. I spot a little girl and her mother walking into the produce section. Hey, That's me!!! Awwww I look so cute and innocent, but believe me people, this is where it gets ugly! I am spying the plastic bag clips and my mother is picking up some regular fruits and veggies. Wait... you might need a visual here.

Yes, this is all my little five year old heart desires. So I ask my mom if I can take a few with me. And she gave me at least three reasons why I couldn't. I don't understand. How is Barbie going to get backstage at the New Kids on The Block Concert without her pass. What? You don't see it?

See it now? Barbie would just slip that over her wrist and she could make it into the concert. I had to make the ultimate sacrifice for my dear friend Barbie! I would sneak just a few of these into my keds and walk out with them in my shoes. Great Plan! So, I pick a few out of the bowl and bend over like I am tying my non-existent shoestrings and slip them in the heel of the shoe. I walked around the Grocery Store with my great find in my shoe, we came to the checkout lane and I nearly broke a sweat. I was for sure the clerk would find my steal! I walked casually whistling, well probably not whistling, but I was smooth. I made it through the checkout line and out of the store. I was in the clear. When we got home I immediately took my find to Barbie and we went to the concert.
My mom came into the room mid-performance. Probably one of my personal favs "Hangin' Tough", and spotted the bag closures around Barbie's wrist. She yelled and took them back from me and swore we were taking them back to the store. I cried and she did make ME TAKE THEM BACK to the store manager. He probably thought my mom was crazy for bringing those back, because they are free and I could have taken the whole bowl and no one would have never known. But it's the principal, she wasn't going to let me get away with being a sneak and a thief.
And from then on, I never stole again.... well, almost....
To hear what other ridiculous thing I stole many years later check back tomorrow.